Star-struck and Stupid!

Good morning readers….

Since yesterday’s post about the city morgue was a bit dark, let’s lighten it up with some dancing! I mentioned this story in my very first post. I hope you enjoy my idiocy…..

The first week in the city we were driving around trying to familiarize ourselves with everything, and what better way to do that than to get a map to the stars homes! It’s important to know that I came out here as a dancer and never gave a thought to the fact that I might meet one of my idols. In the dance world, Gene Kelly, of the very famous film “Singin’ in the Rain” is considered by many to be one of the best dancers of all time. Not only was he incredibly hot, he truly was an amazing and gifted dancer. I had a poster of him on my wall growing up, you know that famous picture of him hanging off the lamp post? Yeah, that one.

I'm not gay!

So there we are, driving around, map in hand and as we started to drive down Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills I said, “OMG, Gene Kelly lives on this street!” (back then I actually said “Oh my God”, not OMG, but now OMG is all you need). I’m looking at the map as we continued down the street and said, “THERE IT IS, THAT’S HIS HOUSE! Pull over, I have to take a picture.” We parked a little bit past his house and there I am hanging out of the passenger side with my camera like an idiot tourist, and I no sooner snapped the picture when Gene Kelly and his wife walk out the front door of the house! Holy shit, I thought I was gonna pass out I was so excited.

this is his house

 

Look how hot I am!

 

 

 

 

 

I didn’t know what to do because this was my first encounter with a celebrity that I loved (I didn’t really love Billy Idol) and there was no way I could pass up the opportunity to tell him how much I loved him and how much he influenced me as a dancer. And yet, I knew it wasn’t totally appropriate to go up to him, but what if I never have this chance again? So I went for it. I dragged my brother with me. We proceeded to chase him and his 30 year old wife down the street, and I mean we were literally running after him (by the way, he was about 80 years old at the time). I ran up to him and just started spewing stupid shit like “Mr. Kelly, I’m a dancer from Philadelphia and I’ve seen all your movies and you’ve been such a big influence on me and I just love you so much and….blah blah blah.” I was such a star-struck moron! Looking back, I can’t believe I did that. Well, don’t you know he’s just looking at me like a confused old man, and when I wouldn’t shut up, he finally just put his hands up in a way that said “okay crazy, back off.” He didn’t say anything, he just put his hands up (jazz hands?). He may as well have been holding a “STOP” sign. He clearly wanted me to get the hell away from him.

Don't come near me or you'll burn yourself....

Well, this crushed me. I couldn’t believe my idol didn’t want to hear my star-struck, complimentary bullshit. But he was clear with his message which stopped my diarrhea of the mouth and finally shut me up. Completely dejected, my brother and I turned away from him, and as we were walking back to the car, I said “Gene Kelly is kind of a dick.” Of course, he wasn’t really a dick, he was just an old man out for a stroll with his ridiculously young wife. I mean, if that was Frank Sinatra his response probably would have been more like, “Get the fuck of here you crazy broad.”

You broads are all alike...

So, the moral of the story for anyone who is a star-struck idiot, is to keep your stupid mouth shut and stay in your car if you happen to see a celebrity. They pretend that they love their fans, and maybe they do, as long as you don’t chase them down the street.

Have a fabulous day!

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About Death To Hollywood

I am a writer/comedian that was kind of pressured into doing a blog. I didn't really know much about blogs which is why I resisted. But now that I have one, I still don't know much about them. I like to tell funny stories that are true. Hopefully, you like to read those kinds of stories. If not, go read something serious and boring.....
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6 Responses to Star-struck and Stupid!

  1. klpeach323 says:

    ‘don’t come near me or you’ll burn yourself.’ lololol.

    funny story.

  2. Josephine says:

    Poor Cee! Poor Gene! But what a bobblehead for a wife! Couldn’t she have been gracious and calmed the whole thing down? Offer to take your picture with Gene? Thank you for your kind words?

    The only star I ever saw in just ordinary circumstances was Ed Ames of Tonight Show fame standing on the porch of his brother? as I was walking home from HS with my friends in Teaneck, NJ. I saw him and poked my friend and we just started laughing. Our third friend was mortified because she was a showbizzy kind of gal. He smiled and waved even though we pointed and laughed. But we didn’t chase him!

    If you’re gonna be a star, you gotta pay the price.

    What do you do when your fans chase you down the street?

  3. mdonohue says:

    You are a riot,and I love that you can be so self effacing.Love,Mom

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