Are you afraid of dead people? If you are, you’re definitely not alone. People have very strong reactions to seeing someone dead. But if you saw them all the time, do you think you would feel the same way? Probably not. I guess the same way a proctologist feels about seeing a different anus every day…they must all seem the same after awhile. I also think that would be a lot worse than looking at dead bodies. I’m not sure if that was the best analogy, but what kind of doctor would choose to specialize in anuses? That’s way sicker than a mortician.
Through the years a lot of people have asked me if I was scared growing up in a funeral home and the answer is “no.” It wasn’t scary for any of us because we never knew life without dead people. Isn’t that ironic? I bet Alanis Morissette would think so. I always looked at the dead people like they were temporary guests in our house and I guess they were, plus my dad always treated them with respect so we followed suit. They were like guests that I never met before but was completely comfortable around, and they seemed to enjoy my entertainment. I kinda liked them in a way because I knew nothing about them so there was no way to judge them. I didn’t know anything about their life, whether they were a nice or mean or crazy person, they were just someone who died and ended up in our basement. Occasionally my dad might tell us something interesting about their life, which always made me a little more curious.
I was having a conversation about the unpredictability of life the other day with a friend. We were going to watch the Eagles game over another friend’s place and we texted him to see when we should come over. He texted back that he was in Texas because his mom died suddenly. So sad.
I think my first realization about how unpredictable life is was when I was seven. A little girl named Robin, also age seven, died and we had the funeral. I don’t remember what she died from but I remember looking at her in the casket and realizing that it could be me. I think something about that realization gave me some sort of peace about death because whenever it’s your time, there’s nothing you can do about it. I think of all the dead people I’ve seen, and although most of them were old, people of every age die and under very different circumstances. That’s why people shouldn’t worry about death; you have absolutely no control over it. It can happen in an instant, and since you don’t know when it’s coming you should party your ass off and have fun NOW! Don’t you agree? I hope you have a drink in your hand right now.
And if there is a heaven, which I hope there is, I think it involves an eternal buffet 🙂 I don’t fear death at all, just the circumstances that could possibly lead to it like falling off a speeding rollercoaster and plunging to my death…or getting eaten by a shark. But once I’m dead, it’s all good, because if you think about it, our bodies are how we experience everything in this life, so without our bodies, it will be a completely different level of consciousness and it won’t matter anyway. I’m deep, aren’t I?
On a serious note, I think the idea of heaven and hell was created by humans to justify good and bad behavior. For example, people need to believe that someone like Hitler or Osama Bin Laden will be punished and burn for all of eternity.
I don’t give a shit what happens to them after they die, as long as they’re dead now, who cares what happens later? I’m more interested in the possibility of a heavenly buffet, a celestial buffet if you will (and I know you will.)
One more thing….people who are alive are MUCH scarier than dead people. They’re the ones you have to look out for. I believe my Hitler and Bin Laden reference proves that.
Hope your Wednesday is WILD!