Is a Moustache Sexy?

Hi readers…

Am I a man or a woman?

I saw on the History channel a show about the history of prostitution. It said there was a famous hooker who was known for her moustache, a feature that was very unusual back then.

Isn’t that still unusual? A hooker with a moustache? Even if she wasn’t a hooker, isn’t a woman with a moustache unusual? Apparently it’s not that unusual since I saw a woman on Hollywood Boulevard yesterday talking to someone with a full blown moustache. She had a nice purple suit on, and was talking to this guy like nothing was wrong. But a woman with a moustache is wrong. Isn’t it?

I had jury duty once, which sucked. I don’t think I have to tell you that I got kicked out because I went off on a tangent about how our judicial systems sucks and innocent people go to jail and guilty people go free, etc. etc. I knew they were happy to get rid of me, and I was too, which is why I said what I said in the first place. Have you seen the people at jury duty? They’re gross.  Which brings me to another woman with a moustache. She was sitting right next to me and I don’t know if she got picked or not, but if you don’t know to wax your moustache, then you clearly don’t know the difference between right and wrong and therefore should not be on a jury.

got wax?


By the way, I could tell the “accused” person was guilty just by looking at him. I would’ve thrown his ass in jail without a trial 🙂

Look, if you’re a woman and you’re reading this and you have a moustache, I know it’s not your fault. However, it is your responsibility to make it go away, whether it’s through plucking, waxing, that “smooth away” product they have on infomercials. It makes people uncomfortable. Look at the woman in the picture! It could easily be a man. Is this the only difference between us and men? Facial hair and a couple of balls? C’MON LADIES!

Alright, I’ll be honest. I was tired last night and I didn’t write a story.  I’ve had a rough week, and was busy last night watching some of the shittiest network TV there is. I’ll write over the weekend, but I didn’t want to leave you hanging because I’m so grateful that people read this at all. So, I combined the lady I saw on Hollywood Blvd. with the show I saw on the history channel and the jury duty lady ( the common feature being the moustache), and decided to tell you about it.

I also saw a guy getting his haircut (he was middle eastern), and he clearly didn’t know that there are supposed to be TWO eyebrows.   I’m so happy it’s Friday…have wonderful weekend and don’t forget to pluck, shave or wax!

What?? There's supposed to be TWO??

About Death To Hollywood

My name is Celeste Donohue and I am a writer/comedian who started this blog to tell stories about my life growing up in a funeral home and my adult life which I have spent in Hollywood, California – hence the name, “Death To Hollywood”. Hopefully, you like to read those kinds of stories. If not, go read something serious and boring.....
This entry was posted in Hollywood, weird and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

13 Responses to Is a Moustache Sexy?

  1. barskii says:

    looks like the unibrow is making a come back ??

  2. Christine says:

    And where do you weigh in on toe hair?

  3. The elder sister says:

    That man needs a little “man-scaping”! How did you get his photo………did you date that guy?!!?
    Just kidding, I know you have better taste than that!

  4. klpeach323 says:

    that guy needs to run a weed-eater between his eyes.

  5. Kris says:

    Moustache’s on men and women are strange! More so on women, but some men look like porn stars with just moustaches:) they are just a strange place to have long hair in general…..

  6. Mr Maryknoll says:

    I dated a girl when I was in West Virginia who had eyebrows (eyebrow)like the guy in the picture. I met her in a bar and used my sure-fire pickup line on her …..”Hey, nice tooth”

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