Vote For Me!

With the Republicans out there campaigning/embarrassing themselves, I felt compelled to comment on and give my opinion about what needs to happen in this mess of a country. First of all, how did it get so bad? I’ll tell you how.

Food and drugs! ( two of my favorite things.)  My observation, a lot of reading and documentaries have led me to believe that between the government, the food industry and the pharmaceutical industry, they have a majority of the country right where they want them; on the couch, half asleep, with the remote control in their hand flipping back and forth between American Idol and other garbage. Why? Because as long as we are addicted to pills and high fructose corn syrup, they can do whatever the hell they want to us. How are we supposed to have any kind of revolution when everybody is on drugs and watching Dancing With the Stars? And more importantly, why are we calling them “stars?”   

By the way, I am a registered independent, which means I hate both sides, and I feel about government the way I do about organized religion, which is that they are self-serving and full of shit. Sorry, I’m not trying to offend, just stating my opinion and you know what they say about opinions, so take it with a grain of salt.

Here’s one way we’re getting screwed:

The banks. Government and the banks seem to love each other. You bail your friends out, right? Except, WE bailed them out, and they’re not OUR friends, because you don’t screw your friends. After we bailed them out, they have the balls to charge the customers ridiculous service fees.  Some fun facts from The Wall Street Journal:

“Banks are going to raise existing fees and institute new ones,” predicts Alex Matjanec, co-founder of “My Bank Tracker”, a consumer-education website.

PNC Bank now charges $25 to close some accounts, and it isn’t the only bank that charges its customers on their way out.

Citibank customers have to maintain at least a $1,500 balance, up from zero—or set up direct deposit and pay at least one bill online each month—in order to dodge the fees.

In the hunt for more revenue, banks also will start charging customers for paying bills over the phone as opposed to online”

This is bullshit and we all know it. Here’s what Thomas Jefferson said about banks:

“I believe that banking institutions are more dangerous to our liberties than standing armies. If the American people ever allow private banks to control the issue of their currency, first by inflation, then by deflation, the banks and corporations that will grow up around [the banks] will deprive the people of all property until their children wake-up homeless on the continent their fathers conquered. The issuing power should be taken from the banks and restored to the people, to whom it properly belongs.”

evil doers

devils

more evil doers

Okay, now let’s talk about Newt Gingrich’s hair and his giant head. What the hell type of hair-helmet-wig is that thing? He’s so creepy and repulsive and his head is so big that I can’t take him seriously. Not to mention that he has nothing good to say.

Look at my giant head!

I’m pretty sure Mitt Romney is a robot.

Rick Perry? How about no more Texans?

Rick Santorum: A prime example of the negative effects of religion and ridiculous conservative, judgmental, “Christian” views. First, of all, douche bags like that give Christians a bad name. Anyone who doesn’t support gay marriage and equal rights, and a woman’s right to choose, can SUCK IT! I posted it on Facebook and I’ll post it here; Rick Santorum will probably get caught snorting coke off a male hooker’s ass in a gas station bathroom. Yeah, that’s right. It’s always the most anti-gay that are caught in the most gay and deviant acts. See ya at the bath house Rick!

Ron Paul is in favor of legalizing marijuana. Need I say more?

Speaking of drugs, here is how we solve the problems in the Middle East. As we know, they are very angry and aggressive over there and they don’t treat their women very nicely, and I have a problem with that. Considering that we hand out prescription drugs so freely in this country, why don’t we use some in a productive, international way.

For example, the drug Ecstasy is not physically addictive (I’ve never tried it, but I want to), and before they made it illegal, psychologists were using it in couple’s therapy and they said that one dose of Ecstasy was the equivalent to a year of therapy!  One dose! At the hearing for the de-legalization of the drug, doctors showed up to protest and said it should be studied more because it has beneficial effects.

This is from drugfree.org

“Effects include feelings of peacefulness, acceptance and empathy. Users say they experience feelings of closeness with others and a desire to touch others.”

Now don’t you think we should just bomb the Middle East with Ecstasy? Get them all doped up on love and empathy, and our problems are solved. People might argue that it would be wrong to “drug” unsuspecting people. My answer to that is, “but it’s okay to kill them?”  Wouldn’t it be fun to watch those angry, religious nut jobs start behaving like they were at a rave party?  We could drop glow sticks out of planes and they would forget about how much they hate everyone.

 I’m obviously not running for office, but don’t you think I should? Just put me in a smart pantsuit and I’ll fix all kinds of problems. World hunger wouldn’t be an issue. I would ship all the fat people to where the starving people are and have all the starving people come here and eat at McDonalds. Problem solved.

Okay, enough ranting for now. Let me hop off my soapbox and wrap this up.  I think we all know I have the necessary skills to run the country, but I just don’t like politicians. What we need is a revolution….or maybe just a whole lot of ecstasy.

I hope your day includes peace, acceptance and empathy, without having to pop a pill 🙂

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About Death To Hollywood

My name is Celeste Donohue and I am a writer/comedian who started this blog to tell stories about my life growing up in a funeral home and my adult life which I have spent in Hollywood, California – hence the name, “Death To Hollywood”. Hopefully, you like to read those kinds of stories. If not, go read something serious and boring.....
This entry was posted in celebrities, Hollywood, weird and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Vote For Me!

  1. meg says:

    you are on, girl!

  2. Kevin says:

    i will see if Our man Rick needs your help in South Calif!

  3. Josephine says:

    Amen, sister!

    And I mean that in the best possible atheistic way!

    You are absolutely right. Governments and banks, corporations and politicians in one unholy, writhing mess like a nest of poisonous snakes.

    We need ecstasy in a whole lot of places. Or at least some damn good weed and wine.

  4. Kris says:

    Oh boy, Cee….i like the ectasy out of planes over the middle east:) Rick Santorum….scary!

  5. Julie H. says:

    Be afraid…those GOP guys are nuts!

  6. Veronica says:

    Demian Bichir for A Better Life will win, LOL, i don’t even watch the oscar’s

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